Entries Tagged as 'Housekeeping, Announcements and Related Fussing About'

Spoofed! Trendwatching pulls a fast one

D’OH!!!

Color me monkey-butt red. Yanno that Trendwatching briefing I posted about on the 6th? The one decrying the death of the pet goods economy, the surging interest in boring hotels and the *shudder* advances in in-utero marketing? Yeah, it’s a hoax. A fake. A spoof.

I got this email on the 7th, but I hadn’t checked this particular inbox before I left for my week long, internet-free vacation. So I’m probably the last to know. Except for you, of course:

We hope you enjoyed the very special trend briefing we sent you yesterday. If you didn’t, then please pour yourself a strong cup of coffee and take another close look. It’s a SPOOF. Fake. Not to be taken at face value. Even most of the sites we referred to are, well, ours—and entirely fictitious.

We thought it would be fun, just for once, to mock overzealous marketers, crass consumerism and—above all—ourselves. :-) So please don’t ditch your pet, stay in ugly hotels, pollute the earth, paint your walls turquoise or start marketing to unborn babies, OK?

Rest assured that we’ll back with ‘real’ trends in December, the kind of trends you’ve been getting from us since 2002. If you can’t wait that long, check out our Trend Database or our 2008 Trend Report. All real, all authentic, all useful. ;-)

Best,

Reinier Evers
Founder, trendwatching.com
reinier@trendwatching.com

Thank God. I was really starting to worry about a world filled with green backlash, mass pet abandonment and prenatal branding. Thank goodness it was only a bad dream, Auntie Em.

But still. It was a cruel, cruel trick. Oh, and uh, if you know anywhere I can offload a like-new turquoise SUV with handstitched seal-fur seats and chihuahua trim, drop me a line will you? It’s, uh, for a friend of mine. A really, really gullible friend…

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In the family way

Nope, I’m not pregnant (God forbid). But I will be OOO visiting the folks this week, and they live so far out in the boonies you can’t see the sticks from there. So the chances of me having a live Internet connection at any given time are slimmer than Paris Hilton’s thong back and likely to offer about as much uptime.

I’ll try to squeeze a post or two in edgewise if I can get some web love, but I make no promises. Yeah, yeah, I know. If I was a smart cookie, I’d have pre-scheduled some posts. Well, yeah. But it completely slipped my mind in all the other stuff I had going on. Like work and life and preparing to spend a week in redneck immersion therapy with my family.

So, uhm, you’re on your own. No monkeyshines!

Site update - moving the furniture

In case you didn’t notice, I’ve been rearranging the sidebar contents a bit. For now, the right hand sidebar will contain site-specific stuff like the search function, recent posts, archives, etc., while the left hand sidebar will be for resources, links, recommended products, etc.

For the moment, though, I’m leaving the internal page links in the left hand sidebar even though they are site-specific. Why? Hell if I know. They just seem to fit there, probably since I’m used to seeing internal page navigation in the upper left area of a website. Of course, I could just eliminate that sidebar widget, since the page links are also available under the banner. What do you think? If you think it makes more sense to move them over or ditch the sidebar version altogether, let me know.

Along with this move comes some new links, the Monkey’s Bookshelf and the Monkey’s Inbox. The first is where I’m going to put links to books I feel are essential reading for you guys. The second is where I’ll list the newsletters and e-lists that I find to be incredibly useful and/or that provide valuable resources in some manner. At the mo, they’re just linked to their own page, but in the near future, I’ll start writing a post about each link and linking the link in the list to that post. That way, you’ll get more information about what I’m recommending and why, along with any caveats or other bits I think you should know before buying/signing up/selling your soul.

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The Organ Grinder’s Glossary

One of the best things about being a word-nerd is being able to play with words - use them in creative ways, create new ones, find new uses for old ones, dredge up archaic terms and phrases from their musty sleep and make them dance for my entertainment…bwaahhaahhahaa! Ahem…

Since this blog is sort of a dumping grounds for the stuff I’m always thinking about, there will likely be memes, neologisms, portmanteaux, turns of phrase, conceptual shortcuts and other such linguistic jiggery-pokery that could prove unfamiliar or confusing. To make life easier on the reader, I’ve set up a page (OGM Glossary). So if you see a term, word or usage that you don’t recognize, there’s a good chance the Glossary can help you out.

And I can play with all my shiny toys without feeling guilty.

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The Inevitable Welcome Post

Welcome to the Organ Grinder’s Monkey. Basically, this is a blog about marketing and how to use it as a tool to change the world, whatever that means to you. Here are the basic (tree)house rules:

1. This is my blog. I’m the alpha monkey here. What I say goes. If you can’t deal with that, please take your banana and go home. But do feel free to come back once you can play nicely.

2. That said, do make yourself at home. The internet’s a big jungle and I look forward to hanging around with anyone who cares to drop by and add to the mix. Chattering, hooting, hollering, shaking large branches and mutual grooming are encouraged. However, public displays of aggression, chest-beating and other such primate nonsense will be tolerated only in so far as they serve to further the conversation. Once they veer from that course into pointless noise, they will be dealt with as I see fit. Appeals may be made, but in any event please refer to Rule #1. And please, don’t poke the obelisk. Just don’t do it. You know what happened last time…

3. There will be absolutely no flinging of poo. Poo flingers will be met with stony silence and a loss of commenting privileges. And I am sooo not cleaning that up.

4. The serving of spam is considered to be a subset of poo flinging, and will be treated likewise. This includes “hidden spam” like pimping your stuff in the comments (unless a special pimp thread is announced) or hijacking threads for your own nefarious plans for world spamination.

5. On the topic of topics, this blog is primarily about marketing 2.0, the web, the global market, the conversation economy and how to use these concepts and others like them to change the world in your own special way. However, I may include other tangential topics as I see fit, especially when I think they’re really cool. Just trust me. It’ll be fun. Got something somewhat off topic, but that you think will interest or benefit my readers? Let me know!

6. Warning: Some mature content. Sometimes I rant. Sometimes I cuss. Sometimes I even rant and cuss at the same time. And sometimes I’ll talk about adult topics, using adult terminology. Just so you know.

7. This is a commercial blog in the sense that the topics herein are are a subset of the stuff I do for a living, and I eventually intend this blog to contribute to that effort. Ergo, yes, you will see affiliate links, product reviews leading to sales pages, ads, self-pimpage and other activities that could potentially lead to me making money. I will do my utmost to remain fair and impartial about such things as product reviews and I will never knowingly or intentionally direct my readers to crap just to make a quick buck. But if the crass commercialization of the precious and delicate art of channeling the muse bothers you…for crying out loud, get a grip already. A gal’s gotta eat, and I can’t maintain my girlish figure on bananas and monkey-chow alone. Refer to Rule #1.

8. The request line is open. I welcome anyone who has anything even halfway cogent to say on the topics presented herein to do so. The more the merrier. And if you want to contribute your own material to the blog, please let me know and we’ll see if it works out. Look around, kick the tires and let me know what you think. See something you don’t understand? Drop me a line. Don’t see something you need? Same thing goes. Disagree with something? By all means, share your point of view. (Behave, but don’t feel you have to pussy-foot around. Monkeys love a rollicking debate.) Heard about something you want me to explain, explore or expound on? Well, for God’s sake, don’t just stand there on the doorstep waving at me - make yourself at home and jump right in. This blog’s going to get real old real quick if it’s just me in here by myself inhaling the dizzying aromas of my own emanations.

9. Don’t forget to tip the monkey when you leave. After all, we don’t work for peanuts, you know. That’s elephants.

Dance, monkey! Dance!